DOWNERS -or- Anime that Need Not Be Watched While Depressed, Melancholy or Blue

As an erudite anime aficionado, one would assume I could select a series to scrutinize without much trouble.  Not so.  In a blue mood, somewhat melancholy of late, do I do the smart thing and pick something rousing to lift my spirits (say, Samurai Champloo or Full Metal Panic!), or amusing to tickle my funny bone (like Ghost Stories or Cromartie High), or even something mindlessly entertaining (perhaps Lucky Star or Karin)???  . . . . . No, rather than an informed choice, I pick out a series carefully crafted to deepen depression and solicit sniffles, sobs and snotty noses.

What would possess me to pop Air into my DVD player? 

Oh, it may look all happy and loving and smiley right now. 

Just wait until age-old curses and supernatural beings come into play. 

Every one of those characters will be crying like a hungry baby with a shitty diaper.

I may as well have chosen 5 Centimeters Per Second, Neon Genesis Evangelion or Rurouni Kenshin: Trust and Betrayal.  Air follows a cursed main character who is destined to die if she ever gets close to anyone.  She has fits when she starts to care about friends, loses the ability to walk, and is racked by great pain.  She was abandoned by her parents and left in the care of an aunt who, in turn, refuses to get close to her (because she's afraid the little girl will eventually be taken away from her).  Her ancestor (sort of) was a "winged creature" and cursed centuries ago.  The story follows her trying to have a happy summer, trying to fill her picture book with "happy memories" and her trying to make friends and often failing.  It is beautifully animated and has a score clearly contrived to coax more tears from unsuspecting viewers (like me).

** SPOILER ALERTS**

For heaven's sake, the main character ends up in a wheel chair, has 24 hours of happiness, and then dies.  DIES!  What's more, she dies after rising from the wheelchair, walking about 20 feet to her aunt, embracing her and then dies while the aunt holds her on the beach in the surf. 

The entire series is designed like Steel Magnolias on steroids.  Hardly an episode goes by where something depressing doesn't happen.  And something nonetheless possessed me to continue requesting the next disk from Netflix.  Other series are depressing in bursts....  The last few episodes of Cowboy Bebop get me crying every time.

See you, space cowboy.

Multiple episodes of Samurai 7 get me teary eyed.

Don't DIE on me, Heihachi!  I don't care that you don't mind being "in the rice!"

The last episode of Moribito has to get you misty if you have a heart.

SERIOUSLY.  You better get choked up, you heartless bastard.

Even shows that are majority tinged with sadness usually mix in enough good spirits and laughs that you aren't left feeling emotionally drained.  Fruits Basket manages to be heartfelt but still enjoyable.

See?  Open arms!  Smile!  Happy ending!!!

So, lesson learned.  Viewing choices must be made sensitive to one's mood.  And I can't imagine under what exceptional circumstances watching Air would ever be conducive to any mood or situation.  Well, except maybe if you have something caught in your eye and nothing to flush it with.  In that case, this series will probably have you weeping enough that all foreign bodies will be expelled from your eye.  Besides that, just pop in some Sgt. Frog and try to forget your troubles.

Dude, it's a frog-alien-invader with an Afro.  What's not to love?

Live Action ... Deadly Casting

Any self-respecting anime fan (and truly, any self-respecting science fiction fan) has at least heard of Akira, and likely watched it multiple times.  Whether you actually enjoy it is beside the point - it was a groundbreaking film and stands up well over time.  Its themes remain timely and its story has never ceased to be gripping and disturbing.  It is a cult hit and for good reason (it boasts an 88% fresh rating at www.rottentomatoes.com and has garnered respect for more than two decades).

With that as the backdrop, news broke this week that Robert Pattinson (of Twilight fame) was being floated as a possible actor to fill the role of Tetsuo Shima.  Matters were made worse for fans of Akira when the same article noted that Justin Timberlake (of 'N Sync, serial dating and Michael Jackson-esque gyrations fame) could be in the running to portray Shōtarō Kaneda.  OK, I'm not even going to BEGIN to get into the concept that a story set in post-apocalyptic Neo-Tokyo is somehow going to be populated mostly with white actors in lead roles (plenty is being written about this dismaying aspect of the casting on the Internet, see e.g., http://www.moviefone.co.uk/2011/03/24/akira-remake-race-row/). 

Now I don't hate Pattinson (though I have absolutely no interest in ever reading or watching anything even vaguely related to vampires that sparkle), and I enjoy some of Timberlake's music and have heard that his acting is improving.  But both actors are so identified with certain roles and are well-known heartthrob types, it seems that audiences would be hard-pressed to separate their swoon-worthy personas from the disaffected, angst-ridden, street-gang members they are supposed to represent.  Not to mention they are both WAY too old to be playing these characters.  Of course multiple other names have been proposed as potential Kanedas and Tetsuos - but almost all are anywhere from 5 years to 20 years too old for the roles, and most are really just too famous. 

Granted....they both have crazy hair.....

So maybe casting like Pattinson and Timberlake would draw in teenage girls in droves (and 20-something women, and 30-something women, and.... well, you get the idea).  But [SPOILER ALERT], do you really think adoring fans want to see their beloved sparkly bloodsucker transformed into this?

Well do you????  I didn't think so.

Of course, it might be amusing to see Pattinson-devotees react in horror when they see how their idol ends up.  Yup, this about sums it up.....

And then there is the truly terrifying casting apocalypse and surely a sign of the endtimes (I wager that someone can find a reference to this in the writings of Nostradamus and I bet the Mayans predicted this as lead-up to 2012).  The horrific, nightmare-inducing, shudder-causing, nausea-inducing idea of Spike Spiegel - the epitome of "cool", the wonderful, nonchalant, martial artist /bounty hunter from the revered Cowboy Bebop - being played by [it makes me sick to even type it] Keanu Reeves.

This man IS NOT Spike Spiegel.

Keanu Reeves may be a very nice man.  He is fit and has the right body-type for Spike.  But he can't act.  And he is, literally, nearly twice the age of Spike.  Spike would never be part of a meme that has pictures floating around on the Internet like this:

Spike Spiegel wouldn't be caught dead with Dawson.  Spike is so awesome, his mere image would resist photo shopping that put it anywhere near James Van Der Beek.

Now I'm not a religious person, but Reeves as Spike is as close to blasphemy as I can conceive.  Is nothing sacred?

Spike Spiegel would kick the ass of anyone for casting Keanu Reeves.  Take heed, producers and casting directors.

Reunited (and yes, it feels so good)

My absence from this humble blog mirrors my sad absence from regular anime viewing.  The past few months have been hectic and carving out time to delve into new episodes or to revisit old ones has been - if not impossible - quite difficult.  There are many good reasons for this, though they are about equally balanced with weak excuses.

But it is a new year and there has been a sign of sorts that it is high time to re-embrace my anime otakudom (which is rightfully in question).  Yesterday I was surfing television channels, aimlessly traversing back and forth and to and fro.  In the midst of my lackadaisical and undirected wanderings, I was struck somewhat dumb and quite astonished.  A channel which I have oft dreamed about but never gotten to watch suddenly appeared on the AT&T U-verse guide. 

Well, that isn't exactly accurate.  The channel did not magically appear.  But it was a channel which heretofore had always presented a bright blue screen informing me in no uncertain terms that "You are not subscribed to this channel".  But this particular Thursday in January, as I flicked halfheartedly among various show descriptions, I found that this channel's bountiful treasures were unexpectedly open to me.  Oh yes, gentle readers, happily channel 1484 (in HD no less) is now available for my 24 hour anime viewing pleasure. 

I feel that there should be some sort of choir singing.  Possible heavenly,
but at the very least made up of prepubescent boys sounding angelic or something. 
Can I at least get a brass choir???

My anime dorkhood blossomed anew.  The malaise that had attached itself, unbidden, to my otakudom began to dissipate.  And now, hardly 24 hours later, I am happily consuming anime shows at all hours of the day and night (interspersed, improbably enough, with Australian Open tennis).  Claymore and Hetalia, Black Blood Brothers and Kenichi, Full Metal Panic! and El Cazador de la Bruja. . . .  Despite the fact that I own most of Funimation's titles and have watched many of the ones I do not own, there is something different about the show being broadcast on TV.  I have the strange habit of stopping to watch movies, replete with commercials, when they air on television ... even when I own the movie in question.  In my quirky mind, it seems special when something I enjoy happens to air on television. 

So I find myself immersed again in the various anime titles I enjoy, and even in some I have only a passing interest in.  I hope this unexpected treat, so pleasantly surprising, will act as entrée back into my anime avocation.  It has been far too long since I greedily consumed new episodes and fondly revisited favorite shows.  There is a stack of unopened DVDs languishing on a bookshelf and dozens of episodes growing metaphorically musty in my DVR.  

So I guess there's only one thing left to say:

I was a fool to ever leave your side

Me minus you is such a lonely ride

The breakup we had has made me

Lonesome and sad

I realize I love you

'Cause I want you bad, hey, hey

Ah, yes.  Reunited and it feels so good

Reunited 'cause we understood

There's one perfect fit

And, sugar, this one is it

We both are so excited

'Cause we're reunited, hey, hey