"Jazz was always there between us . . . . "

There are indelible moments in life.  Moments that transfix, transform, transmute you. Moments that you harken back to. Watershed moments . . . moments that act as demarcations; barriers between the YOU before and the YOU after; foundations for the future you.

I have had two such classical music moments. One was during middle school at the Cleveland Orchestra, as they performed Scheherazade (I defy anyone with even an inkling of musical appreciation to hear those luscious and luxurious symphonic tapestries and not leave Severance Hall unchanged). The second was practicing and performing my very first symphonic work with an actual orchestra (Berlioz's March to the Scaffold with the Cleveland Music School Settlement, under the enthusiastic, nurturing and illuminating Liza Grossman). 

And then there is jazz.  For jazz there was one epiphany, followed by years of a blossoming love and appreciation (as well as months and years at a stretch where I drifted away from jazz, only to be drawn back by a stray cord or syncopated rhythm).  The epiphany occurred at the end of my freshman year of high school listening to the school's jazz band perform.  It was my first real experience with live jazz and it was a game changer.  I am typically drawn to routine, control, predictability and precision.  Jazz turns some predilections on their head - though there are themes and motifs, a framework for the music, there is also flexibility, improvisation, surprise.  After awakening to jazz there were many moments of renewed wonder, but nothing like that eye-opening experience of hearing jazz live. 

Which brings me to anime and yet another renewal of wonder for the art of jazz, and the reaffirmation of the greatness and emotional connection I share with that art form.  Kids on the Slope began airing on Crunchyroll this month and it perfectly captures that first encounter with live jazz.  It memorializes and brings to life a moment I know from personal experience, the you before inspired live jazz and the you after. 

Kids on the Slope is as well-crafted, stunning, smartly written, and inspiring as one would expect from the great Shinichirō Watanabe.  The music blends some very good work by the renowned Yoko Kanno and jazz classics.  The first episode features a passionate drum solo by Sentaro (a central characters) followed by the unmistakable opening notes of "Moanin'" (from the album of the same name by Art Blakey and the Jazz Messengers). 

That drum solo - exuberant and borderline raucous, just like our irascible drummer - cracks through the main character's (Kaoru's) reserve, and you can see by the look on his face that things have changed forever.  His first reflex upon the percussive assault on his ear drums is to cover an ear for protection.  But as the solo gains momentum, the music and its driving, passionate source visibly break through to Kaoru.  His eyes widen, his hand falls, and he actually listens.

Only two episodes in and my own love of jazz is remembered.  I am anxiously waiting for the next episode and filling the time in between with swinging and syncopation, figuratively dusting off my albums (albeit digital) and rediscovering the greats.  This series promise is profound and all one can do is sit back, enjoy the music, and look forward to discovering (or rediscovering) jazz with Kaoru.

Push Play: Real Life, No Embellishment

Second weekend in a row without a surfeit of viewing time (this weekend, though, the excuse was better than a Murder, She Wrote marathon – I was in Philadelphia attending a professional conference). But during the workweek and some welcomed downtime in the hotel room, I managed to get some serious quality time with my Crunchyroll account. My viewing this week saw a complete absence of magic, mecha or malevolence. Instead, the stories I enjoyed were smaller in scale, realistic in portrayal, and definitely relate-able emotionally.

I plowed through another 10 episodes of Chihayafuru (spanning from episode 12 through episode 21), and also watched Usagi Drop in its entirety (a compact 11 episodes). Be warned, there may be mild spoilers ahead.

I will avoid a blow by blow, episode by episode, analysis of the developments in Chihayafuru. Suffice it to say that the show continues to maintain its high level of quality – the art is consistent, the characters continue to develop in interesting and believable ways, and it easily holds the viewer’s interest and makes them curious to see what happens next. Episode 12, “Set These Forbidden Fields Aglow”, has a series of scenes that perfectly depict the love and pride that Chihaya’s parents feel for her (even if she sometimes doubts this fact). The following episodes have a flurry of developments that begin to bring Arata back into the story as more than just memory and speculation by Taichi and Chihaya.

The love triangle further develops. Though, in fairness, I am not sure love triangle is the best way to describe this – this is not a story of dramatic declarations of love. Rather, the burgeoning feelings of Chihaya, Arata and Taichi are subtly played out, with jealousies and insecurities and uncertainties sketched out and revealed in a way that any current or former teenager will readily recognize and empathize with.

But maybe what most affected me in this span of episodes was the changing opinion of the Empress (the team's advisor, a stern and intimidating teacher).  The Empress, over multiple episodes, comes to admire the team's dedication and to nurture them in their goals.  She even decides to forgo attending the tennis team's tournament in favor of chaperoning the karuta club to the national tournament in Omi Jingu.

Of course, there are also developments on the tatami mat. Players gain first victories, advance to higher classes, declare their goals boldly, discuss and hone strategies, and come to love karuta even more. We meet and get glimpses into the lives and motivations of karuta players who are not part of the Mizusawa team.  Earlier in the 10 episodes I watched, the team attends the nationals in Omi Jingu and Chihaya is able to take a first step toward her ultimate goal.

The second series I viewed this week was an utter delight and completely out of character for me. Usagi Drop (or Bunny Drop) is, at its heart, tells the story of how individuals become family. There are some excellent reviews of Usagi Drop that eloquently comment on the art (spare, simple and effective), as well as discussions of the plot and scope of the details laid out (again, spare and simple, concentrating on the realities of life) (for example, check out http://www.animenewsnetwork.com/review/usagi-drop/episodes-1).

As a person who is 99% sure she never wants children and who definitely finds puppies far cuter than babies or children, I was a bit stunned at how much Usagi Drop and the tale of Daikichi (a 30-year old bachelor) and Rin (a 6-year old girl, lovechild of Daikichi’s late grandfather) becoming a family of two affected me.  They meet for the first time as the family gathers at the grandfather's home for his funeral.  Daikichi appears to be the only family member to take more than a passing notice in Rin, who finds herself surrounded by family she has never met, an unwelcome surprise, and alone in the world.

It is intensely personal and sentimental, and this scale allows the story to be told around the realities of a formerly unattached man trying to learn to care for a young girl (not knowing which school backpacks are fashionable, dealing with Rin's anxiety when he is late to pick her up from school, learning slowly how to properly create ponytails).

Interestingly, it is a story told without any typical antagonists. True, the first episode shows Daikichi’s extended family as cold and unfair to Rin, but this soon changes when the shock wears off that the grandfather had an illegitimate child and when Rin (formerly nearly silent) comes out of her shell, thanks to the warmth and affection that Daikichi begins to show her. The only other candidate for villain or antagonist would be Rin’s biological mother. But even here, the story makes the point to reveal her to be imperfect, odd, but very human. She is fleshed out as a young woman with her own dreams and an inability to care for and love her daughter in the necessary way. You do not leave the show liking Rin’s mother, but you at least see her as a complex and insecure individual (who, in many ways, is more childlike than her daughter).

From Daikichi making difficult decisions about his career ambitions as a result of becoming Rin’s guardian, to Rin blossoming into a smart, strong and caring girl (her reaction to younger children and her peers throughout the series is endearing), to the interaction between Rin and Daikichi (especially love when Rin posits that she is too old to be held and read to), the show’s 11 episodes are masterful in how they paint a picture of this impromptu family using subtle strokes of detail. It is the various discrete details – scenes of them brushing their teeth, grocery shopping, sharing a smile, figuring out Rin's size for clothes – that makes their family life come alive. The details are small details, but they resonate. My only complaint is that I wanted more episodes to see Rin and Daikichi continue to grow up and grow together.

Push Play: Something Old, Something New(ish)

This weekend did not find me with a lot of free time for anime viewing.  OK, that isn't accurate.  I got sucked into the Murder, She Wrote marathon on the Hallmark Channel.  Inexcusable for a dedicated anime otaku, but there it is.  Despite the inscrutable wiles of Mrs. Jessica Fletcher, I did manage to squeeze in an old classic as well as catch up on some additional episodes of a newer show.  Be warned, THERE BE (MILD) SPOILERS HERE!

After knocking out most of my errands and chores on Sunday (and having wrestled my attention away from the mysterious goings on in Cabot Cove, Maine) I managed to push play on not only my DVD player, but also my iPad.  One of the bonuses to Crunchyroll viewing of subbed titles is that sound becomes more atmospheric and less necessary for clear understanding.  This means it is the idea tool for use while under a hairdryer on my weekly task of washing and straightening my hair.

So Sunday found me with my hair rolled, sitting on a stool in my kitchen, my ears slowing heating up to unbearable warmness, cradling my iPad on my lap.  My Crunchyroll app opened and two more episodes of Chihayafuru streaming into my greedy hands.

Episode 10 of Chihayafuru ("Exchange Hellos and Goodbyes") finds the Mizusawa karuta club at the Tokyo regionals.  Though they are a club, they have not really gelled into a team yet.  In the lead up episodes, Chihaya has recruited enough players to create the requisite five-person team.  We have seen her shortcomings as a leader, but also her passion and knack for inspiring others.  We have also gotten to know Taichi (part of the rather unequal romantic triangle) better and seen his natural insight into others and inherent leadership abilities come to the fore.  Though there aren't really any surprises in the episode, this doesn't mean the episode is disappointing or rote.  Instead, the prior episodes have begun the process of sketching out the characters in realistic detail.  And that detail means that we can begin to anticipate some of the interactions and find a satisfaction as the characters conform to and sometimes upset our expectations.

Episode 10 and Episode 11 ("The Sky is the Road Home") are really companions, telling the story of the the Mizusawa karuta club forging itself into a team.  It also reveals that Chihaya has been constantly texting/emailing Arata, reaching out to him with details of their karuta progress and hopes to make it to finals.  The episodes do a lovely job of highlighting her feelings for Arata (which Taichi appears to understand better than she does herself). 

Arata also makes a brief (and fairly silent) appearance in the 11th episode.  Though his lines are few and inconsequential, his actions speak volumes.  With just a small gasp, anxious glances at a clock, and the cocking of his head to the side to look at a picture Chihaya has sent of her (of course) victorious karuta team, we get a feeling for Arata's loneliness and continued affection for the friends he left behind and for karuta.  The episode is beautifully done and the emotions all feel genuine.  Even the antagonists of the episode (the Hokuo Academy's experienced and aggressive karuta team) are not left as one-dimensional foes.  Though one opposing team member does play mind games with Chihaya, the show nonetheless fleshes him out and shows his motivation.  And that motivation is not mean-spirited, but comes from a purer place.

Having had my dose of sincerity and competitive karuta, you might think I'd be ready for some sterner, darker, more cynical fare.  If those adjectives can be applied to a "children's" film that, then I did partake in a

more serious tale (albeit wrapped in family friendly, Studio Ghibli trappings). 

Porco Rosso tells the tale of an Italian airmen who happens to be a pig.  No really ... a man-sized pig.  He is the victim of a curse (which is only tangentially mentioned and never fully explained).  The tale takes place post-World War I and, though mostly a light-hearted children's tale, does not shy away from mentioning the fascist government of Italy and touching upon the unpleasantness of war.  It also addresses sexism and, like many of Hayao Miyazaki's works, features a strong, smart and spunky heroine.  That heroine, Fio, is a young aircraft engineer.  Her introduction to Porco lets Miyazaki highlight a strong argument that one not be judged by gender or youth, but by one's abilities.  And as Fio completes a design for fixing and even rebuilding Porco's crippled plane, Miyazaki underlines his point by having the plane assembled by women from the village (young, old and ancient).  Though Porco initially protests, Fio's grandfather points out that with all the men away there is not a choice and, besides, they do good work. 

It is hard to explain why this movie works so well.  It is most definitely appropriate for children, but has enough serious subject matter to interest adults.  With a male protagonist in the body of an anthropomorphized pig, it almost feels like a fable.  The story is simple and does not have many narrative demands, which allows it to unfurl unhurriedly while sketching out the political realities of the fictional world.  Maybe I just enjoyed having serious topics considered, without having politics shoved down my throat or having to feel like the topics were dumbed down.  Everything felt natural - from the content geared toward children to the refusal to ignore the realities of the world.  All in all, not a bad way to spend a Sunday evening.

Every Kiss Begins With . . . . Anime?

It is Valentine’s Day . . . Love is in the air. Well, maybe not – but it could be!

Maybe you have plans – the same old tired activities and gifts that droves of lemming-like couples surge toward. Fancy dinners. Candlelight. Baby's breath. Terribly tacky jewelry (e.g., anything shaped as a heart or the god-awful PANDORA bracelet). The latest brain-dead “rom-com”. Maybe a terribly clichéd marriage proposal with a ring hidden in a hackneyed location.

Why not break out of said doldrums with something fresh and new? Why not (wait for it) . . . treat your loved one to some anime?! Anime has much more to offer than super-powered protagonists, technological mecha marvels, and fan service. Love and relationships play central roles in any number of shows. So in honor of this most gag-worthy holiday, here are some anime selections that might help you entertain your partner, lead to some bonding, give you a good chuckle, or lead to desperate hand-holding in response to unbearable suspense!

If you like your love stories melancholy, achingly beautiful and unfulfilled, try Five Centimeters Per Second.

This film is a visual feast – but avoid if too cynical or if you have a low tolerance for sentimentality.

Maybe you want a burgeoning romance and remembrances of first love. If you prefer your teenage romance mixed with giant mecha, science fiction and a world in peril (and you don’t mind spending 26 to 50 episodes for the complete story), crack open disk one of either RahXephon or Eureka Seven.

Both boast excellent animation, heartfelt performances, intense character development, and admirable soundtracks.

Perhaps science fiction and battles aren't something you want in a coming-of-age romance; in that case, you should tune your home viewing system to BECK: Mongolian Chop Squad.

Easily one of my favorite anime ever – and you get two loves for the price of one! Our protagonist, Koyuki, not only falls in love for the first time, but discovers a love of (and talent for) music. Seeing his love of guitar awaken as he comes to terms with his first semi-adult relationship is well worth the 26-episode duration (and in the end, you just wish for additional episodes). And the English-language dub is excellent.

OK, perhaps melancholy romance, pre-potential apocalypse tales o’ love, or earnest teenage tales of love and music aren’t really your speed. You say: “I need my romance with humor!” In that case, one of my other favorite anime series may just be for you . . . Full Metal Panic!

FMP! does have plenty of drama (our male lead was a child mercenary, later recruited into an international, covert, anti-terrorism military outfit), and does involve science fiction (our female lead and love interest appears to have some very special genes that makes her a target of some dark forces) – but the show manages a rare feat. A nearly perfect blend of action, drama and comedy. Sousuke (male lead) is sent undercover to a Japanese high school to protect Kaname Chidori (female lead); as he has never had a normal childhood and is, at heart, a super soldier, his efforts to blend in are woefully inadequate and his efforts to tail Chidori unnoticed are, to say the least, ineffectual.  And, as they say, hilarity ensues (and so does genuine emotion and, eventually, sexual tension).  As you can see from the screen shot, she occasionally gets - shall we say "annoyed"? - with Sousuke and his lack of subtelty in bodyguarding.   

And for those of you who don’t want romance as a central theme (but are still stuck taking out that special someone), perhaps a horror anime would fill your needs. You can watch something likely to drive your significant other into your arms for comfort and protection, and STILL be entertained!

If you still want a touch of romance, try Blood + (the anime series, not the classic anime film).

A beautiful vampire, a loyal chevalier, gorgeous music, blood and gore. What’s not to love? But maybe your significant other needs sterner stuff in order to be driven into your waiting arms. In that case, you can sample a show that does not include romance but should be enough to freak almost anyone out. When They Cry. 

They may start out cute enough. . . .

  

But things ALWAYS take a demented turn before too long.

Creepy pre-teens (or maybe tween), horrifically graphic demises, characters dropping off like flies. It is enough to give you nightmares. In which case neither of you will be sleeping tonight. Which, after all, seems to be most people’s end game on Valentine’s Day anyway.

Streaming, Subtitles and my Submission

I am heading into my fourth year of anime fandom (coming a year after beginning my fourth decade on this planet). And in those years I have stubbornly withstood the siren call of streaming (not to mention the evocative invites to peruse e-books).

But my technological boycott has come to an end. Namely because my employer offered to reimburse us for iPads and, in the space of a few months, I find myself reading science fiction on the bus and gazing enraptured at carefully crafted anime series in my bed . . . all from that enticing, glowing little screen. There I have it, countless fictional words literally in the palm of my hand (and just a fingertip away thanks to Multi-Touch technology).

So here I sit, with a Crunchyroll membership in hand, debating Hulu Plus membership, and decrying that Apple won’t allow me to download Adobe Flash Player (which would open up the worlds of Viz, Anime News Network and others – sadly, not yet to be). And the unexpected side effect is that I find myself finally accessing subtitled anime without recalcitrance, reluctance or resentment. Though I’m a former avid reader (once an avowed bookworm when I had more time for literary pursuits), I am not and never have been a fan of having to read my television. This has meant that the overwhelming majority of my anime viewing has involved English dubs. But having the subtitled show in the palm of my hand has changed everything. It feels vaguely like holding a book and reading from it while watching episodes unfold feels natural and comfortable.

Even better, I get to watch shows that may never be licensed for distribution in the United States; shows that, while excellent, may not garner enough purchases to make it a worthwhile gambit for US DVD distribution. And for shows that will be released, I can get a head start and get a feel for the show, to then determine if I want to own it.

Which brings me to two shows that I have been enjoying – Gosick (Sherlock Holmes meets Gothic Lolita) and Chihayafuru (part high school drama, part love story, part sport story …. where the sport in question is a traditional card game).

Gosick is really beautifully animated; a polished piece of anime. While not earthshattering, it is fun and has good atmospherics. There are mysteries to be solved – some episodic (The mystery of the ghost ship! The puzzle of the missing girls!), and another spanning the entire series (who is Victorique and why is she a recluse typically confined to campus?). The characters are mostly familiar archetypes, but still amusing. And, at about halfway through the 24 episode series, it is not the mystery, but rather the interaction between Victorique (our doll-like, fiery yet vulnerable sleuth) and Kujo (her one true friend, comic foil and protector) that keeps the viewer invested.

Why I like Chihayafuru is a bit harder to nail down. It isn’t exactly like anything else I’ve seen. There are familiar elements (high school setting; love triangle; beautiful girl who is a reformed tomboy; competitive sport), but somehow their combination feels authentic. The story surrounds a traditional Japanese card game, Karuta, and a trio of friends whose bond is first made playing this game while in elementary school. The show leaves some things unexplained (at least early on) - the three main characters part ways, heading to different middle schools, and those years are only being uncovered bit by bit.  Circumstances allow them to meet again as they enter high school.

There is genuine emotion in this show, with all three main protagonists revealing very real and believable shortcomings, fears and insecurities. This show is still airing and being added to on Crunchyroll – at this point, six episodes in, I’m already anxious about catching up to the currently released episode and having to wait with trepidation to see what happens next.

Like Gosick, Chihayafuru is nicely appointed. Its animation sometimes falls a bit short, but most of it is gorgeous to look at and the opening and closing animation are especially striking. The story gets added depth as the card game that is played, Karuta, is a historical game (and sometimes educational tool) which utilizes 100 poems or proverbs (with variations depending on locality). As our female protagonist, Chihaya, uncovers her love of Karuta and the history and meaning of the poems, we get to experience her wonder, excitement and love of the game as a surrogate. Though the show is heavy in sentimentality, it somehow works. If you are willing to remember the uncertainty of youth and disengage, at least a little, from cynicism and sarcasm, the show has a very real chance of hitting home and striking an emotional chord.

The new year has seen me submit to both streaming and subtitles. And I must admit that my anime viewing is the better for it.

DOWNERS -or- Anime that Need Not Be Watched While Depressed, Melancholy or Blue

As an erudite anime aficionado, one would assume I could select a series to scrutinize without much trouble.  Not so.  In a blue mood, somewhat melancholy of late, do I do the smart thing and pick something rousing to lift my spirits (say, Samurai Champloo or Full Metal Panic!), or amusing to tickle my funny bone (like Ghost Stories or Cromartie High), or even something mindlessly entertaining (perhaps Lucky Star or Karin)???  . . . . . No, rather than an informed choice, I pick out a series carefully crafted to deepen depression and solicit sniffles, sobs and snotty noses.

What would possess me to pop Air into my DVD player? 

Oh, it may look all happy and loving and smiley right now. 

Just wait until age-old curses and supernatural beings come into play. 

Every one of those characters will be crying like a hungry baby with a shitty diaper.

I may as well have chosen 5 Centimeters Per Second, Neon Genesis Evangelion or Rurouni Kenshin: Trust and Betrayal.  Air follows a cursed main character who is destined to die if she ever gets close to anyone.  She has fits when she starts to care about friends, loses the ability to walk, and is racked by great pain.  She was abandoned by her parents and left in the care of an aunt who, in turn, refuses to get close to her (because she's afraid the little girl will eventually be taken away from her).  Her ancestor (sort of) was a "winged creature" and cursed centuries ago.  The story follows her trying to have a happy summer, trying to fill her picture book with "happy memories" and her trying to make friends and often failing.  It is beautifully animated and has a score clearly contrived to coax more tears from unsuspecting viewers (like me).

** SPOILER ALERTS**

For heaven's sake, the main character ends up in a wheel chair, has 24 hours of happiness, and then dies.  DIES!  What's more, she dies after rising from the wheelchair, walking about 20 feet to her aunt, embracing her and then dies while the aunt holds her on the beach in the surf. 

The entire series is designed like Steel Magnolias on steroids.  Hardly an episode goes by where something depressing doesn't happen.  And something nonetheless possessed me to continue requesting the next disk from Netflix.  Other series are depressing in bursts....  The last few episodes of Cowboy Bebop get me crying every time.

See you, space cowboy.

Multiple episodes of Samurai 7 get me teary eyed.

Don't DIE on me, Heihachi!  I don't care that you don't mind being "in the rice!"

The last episode of Moribito has to get you misty if you have a heart.

SERIOUSLY.  You better get choked up, you heartless bastard.

Even shows that are majority tinged with sadness usually mix in enough good spirits and laughs that you aren't left feeling emotionally drained.  Fruits Basket manages to be heartfelt but still enjoyable.

See?  Open arms!  Smile!  Happy ending!!!

So, lesson learned.  Viewing choices must be made sensitive to one's mood.  And I can't imagine under what exceptional circumstances watching Air would ever be conducive to any mood or situation.  Well, except maybe if you have something caught in your eye and nothing to flush it with.  In that case, this series will probably have you weeping enough that all foreign bodies will be expelled from your eye.  Besides that, just pop in some Sgt. Frog and try to forget your troubles.

Dude, it's a frog-alien-invader with an Afro.  What's not to love?

Live Action ... Deadly Casting

Any self-respecting anime fan (and truly, any self-respecting science fiction fan) has at least heard of Akira, and likely watched it multiple times.  Whether you actually enjoy it is beside the point - it was a groundbreaking film and stands up well over time.  Its themes remain timely and its story has never ceased to be gripping and disturbing.  It is a cult hit and for good reason (it boasts an 88% fresh rating at www.rottentomatoes.com and has garnered respect for more than two decades).

With that as the backdrop, news broke this week that Robert Pattinson (of Twilight fame) was being floated as a possible actor to fill the role of Tetsuo Shima.  Matters were made worse for fans of Akira when the same article noted that Justin Timberlake (of 'N Sync, serial dating and Michael Jackson-esque gyrations fame) could be in the running to portray Shōtarō Kaneda.  OK, I'm not even going to BEGIN to get into the concept that a story set in post-apocalyptic Neo-Tokyo is somehow going to be populated mostly with white actors in lead roles (plenty is being written about this dismaying aspect of the casting on the Internet, see e.g., http://www.moviefone.co.uk/2011/03/24/akira-remake-race-row/). 

Now I don't hate Pattinson (though I have absolutely no interest in ever reading or watching anything even vaguely related to vampires that sparkle), and I enjoy some of Timberlake's music and have heard that his acting is improving.  But both actors are so identified with certain roles and are well-known heartthrob types, it seems that audiences would be hard-pressed to separate their swoon-worthy personas from the disaffected, angst-ridden, street-gang members they are supposed to represent.  Not to mention they are both WAY too old to be playing these characters.  Of course multiple other names have been proposed as potential Kanedas and Tetsuos - but almost all are anywhere from 5 years to 20 years too old for the roles, and most are really just too famous. 

Granted....they both have crazy hair.....

So maybe casting like Pattinson and Timberlake would draw in teenage girls in droves (and 20-something women, and 30-something women, and.... well, you get the idea).  But [SPOILER ALERT], do you really think adoring fans want to see their beloved sparkly bloodsucker transformed into this?

Well do you????  I didn't think so.

Of course, it might be amusing to see Pattinson-devotees react in horror when they see how their idol ends up.  Yup, this about sums it up.....

And then there is the truly terrifying casting apocalypse and surely a sign of the endtimes (I wager that someone can find a reference to this in the writings of Nostradamus and I bet the Mayans predicted this as lead-up to 2012).  The horrific, nightmare-inducing, shudder-causing, nausea-inducing idea of Spike Spiegel - the epitome of "cool", the wonderful, nonchalant, martial artist /bounty hunter from the revered Cowboy Bebop - being played by [it makes me sick to even type it] Keanu Reeves.

This man IS NOT Spike Spiegel.

Keanu Reeves may be a very nice man.  He is fit and has the right body-type for Spike.  But he can't act.  And he is, literally, nearly twice the age of Spike.  Spike would never be part of a meme that has pictures floating around on the Internet like this:

Spike Spiegel wouldn't be caught dead with Dawson.  Spike is so awesome, his mere image would resist photo shopping that put it anywhere near James Van Der Beek.

Now I'm not a religious person, but Reeves as Spike is as close to blasphemy as I can conceive.  Is nothing sacred?

Spike Spiegel would kick the ass of anyone for casting Keanu Reeves.  Take heed, producers and casting directors.